My Quick Take on Resolution: Chill, Concise, and Realistic.

Suara Senar Nirwana ⑇
7 min readJan 14, 2024

We are all very well aware that resolutions are haunting as new year approaches: both the previous year’s list and what to do for this new year. Believe it or not, I have always succeeded in making at least 85% of my resolutions to come true, and the key that I discovered are: chill, concise, and realistic. So, if coming into the third week of 2024 and you still feel unsure as to what resolution you would like to make, here’s how I do it.

Make a Grand List

Blurred grand list of mine because I can’t show you my dreams.

Well, I cut sticky notes into long one line to state specifically what I want. Except, I don’t put the year there. This really helped me with implementing the law of attraction thing,

“Decide what you want. Believe you can have it. Believe you deserve it and believe it’s possible for you.”
— Jack Canfield

Whenever a dream pops-up, I usually write it and stick it there. Whenever I want something, I usually go to find my dream list and make sure it is well written there. Because like I said in my previous writing, God will not slip a dream into your heart unless it is for you, or, there is a lesson for you in it.

This is the grand list for things I do not know when it will come true, but, in my prediction somehow, it will not come true this year. Not that we can predict the future, but realistically speaking, according to the planning I have for this year, these are the dreams that somehow I cannot accommodate yet and I am not going to prioritise it. Example? Like owning a house, having kid, go to Socottra, or as simple as eating pisang epe in Losari, Makassar. Out of the blue, it may happen, yes. But, the chances are very slim and I am not by any means have the motivation to make it happen.

However, this list holds a very high importance in my life. This list reminds me a reason to live — that I still have so many things I want to achieve, I want to taste, I want to experience. It also acts as a reminder that when your friends get that, when your friends are able to achieve it, or when your friends acquire it already, you’ll be reminded that it is simply not the priority for you at the moment. Because yes, sometimes, FOMO may cloud over your rationality. Your friends are at the same age as you are, but they are married, they have kids, they are on their way of finishing a PhD already, they are sharing the progress of their house, they are this, they are that, and you are not any of it — and it is okay.

Last but not least, this grand list usually acts as the place where I postpone the dream and telling my self that it is okay for it to not come true now. I will show you how I set the year-specific target in the paragraph that follows after this, but, there were also moment when I have set a target for it to come true this year, but it’s just happen that it cannot. Example again? My application for a master degree. I have written that dream in the sticky notes since early 2021, and I have always stick it to be achieved by that year. However, when the anonuncement says I am not accepted, or that I am accepted but I can’t go due to whatever circumstances, I have to postpone it. So, what I do here is that instead of scrapping the dream, thinking that I am a failure, I put it back to the grand list. This way, I will always have a room for failure, and for trying again. This way, I am able to tell myself that dream has its own time to come, and it’s okay.

The Resolution

Put a Specific Dream for the Year.

So, from that grand list, I regularly stick and unstick dream to my diary (2 years ago I write about how I write my diary and how I find consistency in it. Find it here for part 1 and part 2). So, if you do journaling or have a regular notes you keep for that year (or some months), stick the dreams that you think can be achieved during the period of you writing in that book. Whenever it is achieved, stick it according to the date when it happen, and feel the feeling.

Translate: Watch movie in Cinepolis & Visit Wakatobi

For me, it totally feels amazing. It does not have to be a grand dreams that give me such joy, I could be utterly happy from just eating mie bakso firman with my bestfriend because we’ve been planning it for months but it just won’t come true. Sometimes, it is also some silly thing like watch sunset in Ancol while drinking coconut water, or having a scooter date strolling around GBK. Those kind of dreams are as important as my dream to pursue a master degree, because in my principle, how would you appreciate big things if you cannot appreciate small things in your life. Making it as a wishlist really helps me with appreaciating those little things.

The one that I attach in the picture may sounds easy, but trust me, Cinepolis in Jakarta were not close to where I lived so whenever we want to watch movie, we always choose one located close to our home. So, when it finally comes true, especially that my super bestfriend gave the free ticket for us, I was so happy, over the moon you could say.

And so when I have been trained to appreciate those small things, you can see from my writing how very much happy to the point I can’t believe it is happening when I finally get the acceptance from the program in the university I am currently studying in. Yes, this sticky notes have been written since 2021 — and yes, this had moved back and forth from the grand list, to my diary, to the grand list, to my different diary (I think this note have went through 4 different diary? I guess so). And so, finally, the sticky notes is sticked in a specific date that it finally comes true, I was the happiest person on earth that day, I could bet.

So, I do the same with 2024. I have rough plan on what I am going to do this year, so I stick many resolutions that are in line with my plan.

This list is reviewed whenever I finish the book — because sometimes some resolution are no longer feasible to come true this year due to the timeline has passed, or for whatever reason. Sometimes also, mid year or whenever, we have a change of plan that may allow different resolutions to come in. This way, I am very much flexible with my resolutions and never see myself as a failure whenever certain resolution is not coming true. I see that this is important because many of us, maybe you included, put too much pressure on ourselves when it comes to our resolutions. Thus, mid-year, when you see that many of your resolutions are just some ink on paper and you decide to not pay attention to it anymore, you may feel like a failure.

Don’t.

Because all you gotta do is chill, be concise, and be realistic.

Well, like I said, failure is an integral part of our life. You can’t always succeed in everything you do. However, to fail and to feel like a failure is two different thing you should notice. You may fail and still feel like a winner — because at least you learned something. You may win and still feel like a failure — because you push yourself too hard.

Being ambitious is goooood. Believe me, I am labeled as one of that ambitch too, if not now, at least back then. However, the way that I see it now is we gotta chill, be concise, and be realistic with our dream. Dreams have their own timeline to come, to happen, and so chill when it’s not coming this year. Be concise and realistic, because we have limited resources — time wise, capability wise, and capacity wise. You can dream, and in fact, dream as big as you want. However, do not limit yourself to certain target of achieving that dream to the point you will feel like a failure when you pass that limit and not yet achieving it.

Be flexible, and don’t be too hard on yourself, okay?

Love,
Anin ❤

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Suara Senar Nirwana ⑇

This is Anin’s public diary consist of her opinion, experience, and thoughts.