12 — A Letter to Myself in The Beginning of 2024.

Oh so long, Aninda. I had planned on writing this letter to you but I didn’t imagine the feeling I would have at this moment. Honestly, I sort of want to hug you because 2024 has actually been a lot.

I remember you thought that 2024 would be boring to the point that we got so anxious for the calm. We knew that there would be no significant changes in our life, unlike 2023 when we don’t know when we will end the year (either in Lund, Jakarta, or perhaps Edinburgh). The 3024 ending is sort of expected — we will be in Lund and this higher certainty weirdly gives us anxiety and becomes an overplanner hahah. We indeed end this year in Lund but excitingly, this would be our first (and probably last) time of having the year change while being physically in Lund.

I remember I kept on writing the same plan and the same forward-looking in our fridge, in the notes, in our calendar, on whatever surface we could to ensure there was something we could look forward to this year and that was exactly the problem. The certainty did not make me look forward to what 2024 holds. Little did I know, I was so wrong. 2024 has a lot for me. Whilst we have plans certainly going to happen, so many things could still happen anyway.

We did not know, not until early February that we were going to do umra with Ridwan for the first time in Ramadan — this was so lovely and we were over the moon and can’t be thankful enough to Allah for inviting us. We did not know, not until spring came that we would not be going to Stockholm together but we had a lot of trips such as one where we walked for 10km to Lomma beach. We did not know, not until late spring when we decided we would be in Indonesia for the whole 3 months. Now I kinda regret that decision but we have made peace with it. Oh if you’re wondering, I was kinda afraid that that summer would be my last chance to experience midsummer and midnight sun and oh to explore the EU when actually not necessarily. I might get that chance again. I will, in fact.

So many things happened and so many dreams actually came true. We had another umra (yes, we did 2 umra in a year, this was something I would not even dare to imagine back in 2023) and this time we went with my mother-in-law. I also finally got a part-time job here in Copenhagen, yes, in COPENHAGEN, the city I have been dreaming of for so long to have a job in, and LOVE this part-time work so much as it aligns a lot with my studies and my future plan. Talking about future plans, surprisingly, this year we have a strong will of wanting to pursue a PhD and I have laid. a solid strong reason for it. This is weird for me because recalling early 2023 when I applied for this master's, I did not even have a PhD on my wishlist at all, now this is among the other things that kept me going.

I have so many things that keep me going every day. If I compare this to myself back in 2021–2023, I grow so much. I make peace with a lot of stuff that has passed. I create closure for all chapter I have to close. Whilst 2025 seemingly going to be even more exciting (because I will graduate and new things are coming up, new plans are happening, etc.) 2024 has been very kind. It’s not the kind of a rushing year for me, but one that allows me to relax and enjoy every moment. Dear myself in 2024, even when you think not many things’ gonna happen this year, SO MANY things are actually happening. Thank you and let’s welcome so many more exciting things in the upcoming days.

Love,
Aninda.